Today I really had one of the best days I've had for a long time. Sadly, it has nothing to do with the children. They were their normal selves today. It all has to do with Robert, Evan and my friends. Last night Robert and I were trying to spend some time together. When Noah wakes up out of the middle of nowhere. He hasn't woken up for weeks and last night he woke up. It took me a while to get him to sleep, but I gave him some ibuprofen and he slept long enough for Robert and I to really some great time alone. Thank God for this! Because of a great night I woke up in the morning with a smile and a great out look on the day.
I've been checking my email a bit more than I normally do. You see last week I sent out an email asking a very dear 20 something some very personal questions about his sexuality. I know it's really none of my business why Evan is gay. But because I lived with him and his family for four years and took care of him and his brother as their nanny, I really felt the need to know. Not that he needed to answer me, but I thought I'd ask. It's not even like I've seen Evan and David a lot these past years. They are grown now and in college. They are not the little boys I once took care of. There is a place in my heart for them that is hard to describe in words but when I think of them, yes they are grouped together, I think think of their trusting, tender little brown haired boys that used to run like monkeys and had the intelligence of children many years older than they were. I was checking my email to see if Evan would write me back. Like a little girl waiting for her crush to send back the note she wrote to him with the boxes "yes" and "no" written above them with the question "Do you like me enough to tell me about your sexuality" then mark yes. As you can probably guess. He wrote me back. Evan still likes me!!
Today I also talked with a new person in church Jenn and for whatever reason I get a really good feeling about her. She's newly divorced and has moved back here to start her life over again with a two year old and a newborn. She and I found out that we have something in common. Our friend Dusty. It makes me so happy to have that happen! It feels like I know her that much better now that I know she was Dusty's friend too! I love Dusty.
I got to talk to Renee today. She's been feeling very overwhelmed by her three small children and has been having a hard time with her husband because he's not feel very sympathetic towards her. Plus his dad just died and he hates his job so things aren't really going his way. But I got to talk to her anyhow!
I can see from looking at what I've just written that I really miss connecting with people. Hannah and Noah have been sick for the last two weeks so we haven't been able to have anyone over here for a while so my batteries have been running pretty low.
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